EGO

He wants to defend his ego, to defend himself. What he does is good, and then he does so many things, he brags about it, he brags about doing so many things. Of course, he is not arrogant, he is not pretentious. He just knows. He holds the truth.  
Then, why is he here? Why did he travel so many kilometers to come? He self-justifies himself, he complains. “Me, I am a kind person, I am respectful, the other is not. He does not understand me, he does not listen to me. Everything I do is good, I make mistakes of course, but I am able to recognize them, I am a responsible person.”
Do not lose face, do not admit what common sense – the reason according to Descartes – says. What does he have to lose? If he admits anything, he will no longer exist. Deep down, he knows he is lying to himself, but is not yet ready to admit it. Maybe someday…

MISERY

Most humans like to tell stories, to the others, to themselves and believe in them, or at least pretend to believe in them. Why some people come to the seminars? They look for what? Remedy to their deep boredom, of their existence, of the world, of themselves. Humans don’t love themselves, think they are boring, not interesting to the eyes of the others. So they cling to something, come here to fill the void of their existence, to give themselves a «supplement of soul», to meet some different people. Way of escaping reality, way of escaping oneself. The self who is the access to reality or the return of reality.
Self-abuse, the Other is not better than us and suddenly, he is. He has something more. What is it?

INCOHERENCY

Between the words and the acts. Between what is said and what is done. How to find out? What to do? Let say or say? To let one say is to accept what is said by knowing the problem that is posed, it is to accept being a coward, it is to avoid the often interminable stories, it is to deny oneself, it is to pretend. To say is to take a risk, it is to go to a confrontation that will not lead to a lot, it is to accept that the other explodes, becomes irrational, it is to show bad faith. It’s raising awareness. Should one still knows who his interlocutor is…

CHOICE

“I don’t have the choice”, “I did not have the choice”: it gives place to all the extravagances, all the impossibilities. Deep feeling of impotency, of despair, of enslavement to its own will. God, if he exists, has given man free will. Free will, which gives responsibility to oneself, to others and to the world. Difficult responsibility to assume. Refers to an inability to make decisions, to a lack of self-esteem, to a lack of self-confidence.

Feeling of nullity, of uselessness. Inability to do anything, to act. Or it’s the opposite: they have an overestimated vision of themselves and think they know better than others, that they are worth more than themselves. Others who do not understand us completely: self-complacency, egocentricity, narcissism.

Desire for perfection, desire to be God or to be like God, desire to measure oneself to him.

FAMILY

We hide behind it, it gives us obligations, more than necessary. It’s also a common pretext: “I have no choice, my family is counting on me; she needs me. I am so busy nowadays during the day, because I have family coming from far away.” This may not be false, but to what extent we use it as an alibi, as an excuse for not thinking, not doing something else. The family is invasive. But she is useful, and then she is always there when we need her, though… Why? To fill our loneliness, to give something. So the meaningful would be love? We should not exaggerate anyway…
Family who nibbles you little by little, invades you, takes your space, absorbs all your energy. Family who threatens you, blackmails you, who thinks she has all the rights, who never leaves you in peace, which engenders various feelings such as shame, guilt. Place of the irrational, of all possibles. A place with which it is difficult to be indifferent or to have distance. Family that we love and hate at the same time…

NOT LOVING ONESELF

People do not love themselves. Why this lack of self-esteem with themselves? Why this desire of “always more”? Of “not really”, of “yes, but it is not like that” or “Yes, but it is more complicated than that”… Fear of not being well understood. Fear that the others do not fully understand what they are saying, that they misinterpret everything they really wanted to say. Man likes to tell stories, to others, but especially to himself. Does he really know what he means, is his thought really clear? Or no, it is just one more story he likes to tell himself?
Explain, explain to create confusion among others, explain when the other did not ask, add useless words, repeat what we said with new words, contradict ourselves sometimes, say anything.
To learn to say what we want to say without going into details, to learn how to separate the essential from the secondary, from the superfluous. Difficult work of thought that requires rigor. “I want to explain to you”, that is to say, to clarify, to deepen. Necessary or not? At the other to decide.